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  • Writer's pictureYesYou.Anna

When your brain tells you to stay quiet

I find it's usually better to stay quiet in those meetings.

I clutched my notepad a bit tighter and continued walking down the narrow grey corridor beside my new boss, staring intently at my M&S loafers.

I was new in the role and we had just left a meeting with the CEO, a senior finance person and some external consultants. I had made two points and asked a couple of clarifying questions, all of which were (seemingly) well received. I had felt all smart in my new work appropriate dress. All in all, I had thought it had gone pretty well. Until now.

I walked along silently beside my boss pondering his comment I find it's usually better to stay quiet in those meetings.

Fast forward to 2022 where I coach people on speaking up all the time. It's a hot topic. But it's usually the voice in my client's head telling them to stay quiet, not their boss!

If you don't always speak up, do you have a little version of my boss in your head? Is that voice saying something like I find it's usually better to stay quiet in those meetings.

Believe me, that voice in your head has a big impact on your work life. Here's one example:

I was thinking - I have useful points to add (so I spoke)

My boss was thinking - It's best to stay quiet in these meetings (so he stayed quiet)

What are you thinking in your meetings - ???

If you are in the room, you are literally being paid for your thoughts. Your thoughts and ideas are what is creating value for your organisation, but I bet your brain doesn't remind you of that very often does it?

Your workplace and the world NEEDS to hear you.

If you want help to speak up, this is some of the work we will be doing in Confident at Work, the coaching and training programme for professional women who want to grow their confidence - email me on to find out how you can start speaking up. We start in April, get in now.

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